Get Your Popcorn Ready

Man, I literally raced home for this. Popcornus interruptus. Shit.

This certainly squares the circle.

@karen marie still has her eyes tight shut: You and your science talk. Stop.

Seriously, I come back from a prolonged absence and Todd Akin stands me up? That fucking HURTS.

Loving the Picture-in-Picture Piers has up now (for those not watching, it has “Rep. Todd Akin’s Empty Chair” documented for all time). That’s good producing.

Which means of course that Aaron Sorkin’s writing it into next week’s The Newsroom. That fucker can write a teleplay, you know.

I will not be interrupted from my Dinner With Rachel, but that empty chair is better than any appearance could have been.

@nojo: You know, I skipped Rachel for watching this. I know I can DVR Rachel re-set for later tonight, but it proves that I should NEVER stray.

And Piers is trying to get Ricki Lake to comment on Todd Akin. And she… dodges?

Woof.

There’s a Comfy Chair gag to be made, but my mouth is full.

To be clear: Piers Morgan is not middle class.

Wow. An idiot, a dolt and now a coward. If you’re running from Piers Morgan then you really have no bidniz on the national stage.

@Benedick:
Upper class wanker?

@chicago bureau:
Nice to see you back.

Well that was fun. Sorta.

But I gotta say this — and if you’re not into psychological venting, feel free to eject now. Seriously: a major depressive episode? NOT FUCKING FUN.

All of this is by way of saying: my apologies to all for my extended absence. Life, from last August onwards, really took the wind out of me. Not even a terribly fun trip to Canada shook me out of it. The fears of loss, alienation, abandonment and all that had me in very, VERY bad places. Dark places. Suicidal, even.

This is deserving of a longer, Tell Stinque About Your Mother post, but: thoughts of suicide are hard to shake when things are going terribly wrong. Even when the thoughts are totally divorced from reality. When you begin to think that nobody will miss you when you’re gone, and when you think you are simply a replaceable cog, and when you don’t want to burden anybody by laying your troubles on them, you’re in a tough, tough spot.

And when you start to plan it all out? You know it’s all over, and you can relax and think “my problems are over.” I thank God that the moments of clarity in that time caused me to reassess and pull back, almost instantaneously, from the brink. And caused me to reach out to a friend who led me out of the bad places.

(Will suspend further comment, for fear of going all Prommie on y’all. Unless I already have — in which case, I apologize, like the wannabe Canadian I am inside. It is enough to say that I’m fine, but the dark moments still come, and I’m still fighting.)

Well, back to my quarter-century reading of the Federalist Papers. “An unrestrained intercourse between the States…” Bad Hamilton! Naughty, naughty Hamilton!

@chicago bureau: Glad to see you back. I’ve missed your voice.
Many of your fellow Stinquers have wrestled the noonday demon, and I have been close to suicide myself more than once. I’m VERY glad you’ve found your way back, and never think that no one would miss you. We would. Very much.

Glad you’re back, CB. Even gladder you’re feeling better.

TJ/Not to tempt fate, but can it be true we’re all in a better place lately? Seems like it.

@ManchuCandidate: If you’re running from Piers Morgan then you really have no bidniz on the national stage.
Piers makes Larry King look like Edward R. Fucking Murrow.

@chicago bureau: I know exactly how you feel. Please don’t apologize. Don’t. It’s okay.

@Tommmcatt May Just Have Some MJ In His System As Well, So What?: I’m homeless in Seattle…

Okay, I’m in a shelterish place.

But mentally? Yeah, I’m glad to be free of my fucking relatives. Only my kid knows I’m here. That’s good until they put the fucking screws on him. They are sick bastards.

@chicago bureau: Welcome back, we’ve missed you. And like Mistress Cynica said, many of us around here seem to have dealt with Churchill’s black dog. I think a tendency to severe depression is a side effect of hyper-awareness and sensitivity to the bullshit of life. It’s no fun but you can claw your way out, and those of us around here will listen.

@JNOV: You did the right thing to leave that shitshow.

@chicago bureau: Stay strong, CB. Many of us have been there, and we’re only a few clicks away if you need us.

@chicago bureau: I’m really glad you’re feeling better. Only one thing concerns me: you had fun in Canada?